Your ego's writing checks your body can't cash

Twitter. Tweet. The Twizzle. Twitphilia. Twat. Twitching. Tweeple. Twitaphobia.

I now have a "handle" on Twitter. Ugh. I am more than sorta angry about it. But I was forced (no, seriously, forced) to sign up by Mr. Roadmonkey. Literally, dude went onto the site, made up some dumb name for me (Roadmonkey Girl? Do I look like the kind of chick that wants "girl" or "ette" on the end of anything? Do I dot my 'i's with small hearts? Hey, while your at it, buy me some pink stationery with "Steffie" at the top and put a bow in my hair....maybe will make it easier for you to hold when I puke on your shoes).

So, I've quickly become interested in the mass hysteria around "Twitter ruining civilization" and being only for megalomaniacs (since I, of course, as a self-deprecating blogger can not yet be counted as an egoist). Do I believe I am witty? Of course. Do I think I'm interesting? No. Should anyone other that the 6.3 people who read my blog have to be exposed to my inane ramblings, propensity for politically incorrect comments and toilet humor? Of course not. (AND I can't even do any of those things in Tweets because I represent a "brand" of "educated travellers" who "want to make a difference." Apparently, people who want to make a difference aren't allowed to make fart jokes.)

Which leads me to the question of the hour:
What the hell am I going to Tweet about?

Topics I've considered are as follows -- please email/FB/tweet/blog comment/text/call/fax/mail/sign language/write in snow any and all suggested additions:

- Wanting to hire a cleaning lady for my apartment that's the size of a small yurt

- Liking the word "yurt" and all stories associated with "yurts"

- Being slower than people pushing baby carriages while running

- Liking marshmallows....a lot

- My personal recipe for disaster: Agua de Valencia

- Is it quicker to Chicago or by bus?

- Food I missed the most while backpacking: Sushi

- Food I missed the most while living in Europe: Sushi

- The glory of the Stroopwaffel

- How much I hate Rachel Ray, for no reason

- The non-altruistic reasons I want to go to Brazil

- Singing in the shower

- Paper vs. plastic

- Appreciation for mandatory recycling

- How to get rid of fruit flies